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Nannyp
Moderator
Joined: 29 Apr 2007
Posts: 1405
Location: Vienne, France
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 Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 12:41 pm Post subject: Fruit Cake |
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This is an excellent recipe for an old favourite.
Fruit Cake Recipe
"Fruitcakes make ideal gifts because the Postal Service has been unable to find a way to damage them."
You'll need the following:
a cup of water
a cup of sugar
four large brown eggs
two cups of dried fruit
a teaspoon of salt
a cup of brown sugar
lemon from your neighbor's tree
nuts from last walnut grove on Piedmont Rd.
a bottle of whiskey.
Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl. Put it down somewhere.
Check the whiskey again.
To be sure it's the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Repeat.
Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in that large, fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.
Make sure the whiskey is still okay.
Cry another tup.
Turn off the mixer! It's splattered dough everywhere!
Beat two leggs and add to the fluffy bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Mix on the tuner.
If the fired druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity... Whew is it hot in here ?
Okay.. Next, sift two cups of salt... or something.
Check the whiskey.
Now sift the lemon ... urp ... juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table ... spoon ... of sugar or something ... Who cares? Whatever the heck you can find.
Grease the oven.
Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.
Check the whishkey again.
Throw up in the bowl and go to bed.
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MissMuppet
Admin
Joined: 29 Apr 2007
Posts: 1635
Location: Folkestone, Kent
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| Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 1:03 pm Post subject: |
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Can I just point out to any trusting sorts that this isn't a real recipe... :smt030
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Nannyp
Moderator
Joined: 29 Apr 2007
Posts: 1405
Location: Vienne, France
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| Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 1:13 pm Post subject: |
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Oh come on Jo...surely you don't think anyone will try and make it
do you :shock: :shock:
I'm now worrying about the type of clientelle you are attracting to this forum :roll: :roll:
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NannyP's Hens
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MissMuppet
Admin
Joined: 29 Apr 2007
Posts: 1635
Location: Folkestone, Kent
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| Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 1:22 pm Post subject: |
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| Nannyp wrote: | Oh come on Jo...surely you don't think anyone will try and make it
do you :shock: :shock:
I'm now worrying about the type of clientelle you are attracting to this forum :roll: :roll: |
You never know!! Remember non-registered people can see this too! :lol:
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whthjz
Guest
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| Posted: Tue Jun 26, 2007 11:08 am Post subject: Re: Fruit Cake |
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| Nannyp wrote: | This is an excellent recipe for an old favourite.
Fruit Cake Recipe
"Fruitcakes make ideal gifts because the Postal Service has been unable to find a way to damage them."
You'll need the following:
a cup of water
a cup of sugar
four large brown eggs
two cups of dried fruit
a teaspoon of salt
a cup of brown sugar
lemon from your neighbor's tree
nuts from last walnut grove on Piedmont Rd.
a bottle of whiskey.
Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl. Put it down somewhere.
Check the whiskey again.
To be sure it's the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Repeat.
Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in that large, fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.
Make sure the whiskey is still okay.
Cry another tup.
Turn off the mixer! It's splattered dough everywhere!
Beat two leggs and add to the fluffy bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Mix on the tuner.
If the fired druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity... Whew is it hot in here ?
Okay.. Next, sift two cups of salt... or something.
Check the whiskey.
Now sift the lemon ... urp ... juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table ... spoon ... of sugar or something ... Who cares? Whatever the heck you can find.
Grease the oven.
Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.
Check the whishkey again.
Throw up in the bowl and go to bed. |
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